Saturday, May 23, 2015

She Shall Outdistance Calamity Anywhere She Goes

When she comes back--
    into the world, red and slick, re-
    incarnated she will not wait--

She will squall without the spank--
    Warrior cry,  Pen poised--
     to mar the blank slate--

New life, new woman--
    New dress? Perhaps--
    Yes, to be sure.

Trouble will come to call.
     She will have her track shoes on
     before the knocker can sound.

Bus, train, car or fleetest foot--
    Speed boat,  aero plane--
   Leaving Trouble in the dust.
----
I chose the third choice, Kenia's Wednesday challenge, for my inspiration.
I had written off Marianne Moore a long time ago (the HYPHENS!!!) and it was nice to revisit her work. She was a lot better the second time around. I could even see a similarity of style between us.

I took my title from her poem "Diligence Is to Magic as Progress Is to Flight."
I also chose to follow her style and see if I could make those confusticated hyphens work for me.
Her original poem : here


9 comments:

  1. I think you succeeded.. There is a staccato with the hyphens that you captured. Sounds like a good reason to escape.

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  2. This was brilliant :D
    Loved it!
    xoxo

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  3. Very nicely done! I like the brevity of expression and I like the use of dashes - they create pause and expectation.

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  4. It's so challenging to write from a source you don't especially like, but you've done a fine job of managing the &%$# hyphens and crafting something worthwhile.

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  5. Oh, how I love those first two stanzas! Awesome!

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  6. --no rhyme? it works for me. precise &condensed. (i'm messing with you w/ Moorish type)--"yes. to be sure" was my favorite. I like it when the poet thinks on the page.

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  7. If there could only be a second chance at life we would be better prepared.
    ..

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  8. I think you made it work, and created a fascinating character in the process.

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  9. Love the dashes..sort of a breathless feeling to it. Love that second stanza!

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